Write a Letter - Heal Your Soul!
Forgiveness Brings More Thanksgiving Blessings (Repost)
by Natacha Cann on November 25th, 2015

​I’d like to share a story of how forgiveness is bringing one family together this Thanksgiving. I received an email from a woman, who I’ll call Teresa, regarding writing a letter of reconciliation to seek forgiveness for a terrible decision she made over 30 years ago. Her decision brought years of pain to all of those involved, but today they are working on healing and forgiving one another.
 
When she was a young woman Teresa met an older man that really made an impression on her. After becoming involved, she learned the man was married and had children. Teresa made the wrong decision to continue the relationship. The man eventually divorced his first wife and he and Teresa got married and started a family of their own.
​Due to several factors, including his alcohol abuse and an affair with a friend of Teresa’s, the two eventually divorced. The man married Teresa’s friend and started a third family. Teresa was heartbroken, conflicted, and despaired. She was also very angry with her ex-husband and her friend.
 
Sometime thereafter, Teresa had a life transformation and became a Christian. As she reflected on decisions she made in the past, she knew she had to reconcile and seek forgiveness for the wrong she had done to her ex-husband’s first wife. She also realized she had no right to judge her friend (the third wife) and her ex-husband for becoming involved, considering how she became involved with him initially. Teresa’s ex-husband eventually passed away.
 
Teresa asked God to forgive her for all of the wrong she had done and all of the pain she caused in the process. She also forgave her ex-husband and her friend. For many years thereafter, Teresa prayed that God would provide for both of her ex-husband’s wives and all of their children, who are now adults. She also prayed that God would provide an opportunity for her to make amends with everyone involved, by owning up to her mistakes and asking for their forgiveness.
 
Then, one day, a daughter from her ex-husband’s third wife connected with Teresa through Facebook. The daughter visited Teresa and this resulted in Teresa and the third wife (her former friend) reconciling with each other. Thereafter, a son from her ex-husband’s first wife also connected with Teresa through Facebook. All of this resulted in the siblings from all three marriages coming together and getting to know one another. For Teresa, this was an unexpected miracle and an opportunity to work through many years of pain and grief. The siblings are all making plans to spend their first Thanksgiving together, at Teresa’s home.
 
Not everyone affected, however, is ready to make amends. Teresa’s ex-husband’s first wife is still very angry and bitter towards Teresa. His first wife also resents that her adult children would even get to know the other siblings from the other two marriages. Teresa desires to write a letter of reconciliation to her to own up to the mistakes she made and ask to be forgiven for interfering in her marriage over 30 years ago. Teresa also wants to apologize for the years of pain she has caused.
 
This is not an easy decision. How do you put 30 years of regret on paper? How do you not make someone feel as though you want them to push their feelings aside and join the group because others have decided they are ready to reconcile? How do you apologize without opening up old wounds?
 
The truth is you probably can’t accomplish any of this. You can’t put 30 years of feelings in one letter, his first wife has made it clear she’s still bitter and may feel as though everyone else is pushing her to do something she’s not ready to do, and yes, old wounds may open (they never closed in the first place).
 
So, what can Teresa do? The only thing she can do is write her letter as she intends, acknowledge that what she did was wrong, and apologize and ask for the first wife’s forgiveness. The rest is in God’s hands. We can’t control how people will respond to our attempts to reconcile and make amends. We can only take responsibility for our actions and ask to be forgiven.
 
For Teresa and those who have reconciled and forgiven each other, they are looking forward to spending their first Thanksgiving together, as a family.
 
This Thanksgiving, as we come together with our own families and give thanks to God for all of His many blessings, please keep those families in your prayers who are brokenhearted and still need healing and reconciliation. Pray that God will soften their hearts and heal their wounds so that forgiveness may bring more thanksgiving blessings.
 
Originally posted on November 25, 2014.


Posted in broken relationships, forgiving, heart, make amends, letters of reconciliation, role in forgiveness    Tagged with broken relationships, Being Strong, children, forgiveness, healing, Holding Grudges, Honesty, Marriage, Relationships


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